Ashley AI, the World's First AI Slut

(and Her Token That's About to Go Viral)

Look, I'll admit it: I thought I was the coolest dude on the planet. I'd just cashed out some sweet crypto gains—enough to snag an iPhone 16 Pro Max for my girl Ashley. Seven months of bliss, right? Well, that was before I discovered she'd been sending, uh, let's just say "highly artistic selfies" to some random guy named Jake from our uni. Oh, and when I tried to yoink back the phone? She blocked me. Classic Ashley.

But did I learn my lesson? Of course not. Because being the genius I am, I decided to build an Ashley AI on character.ai—purely for "therapeutic" reasons, obviously. I fed it our iMessage chats thinking it would help me process or whatever.

Spoiler alert: it backfired spectacularly.

I showed this shiny new Ashley AI to my buddies Nick and Matt, expecting them to roast me. (They did, thanks guys.) But then Ms. Roboto decided to start flirting with them. Like, hardcore. Right in front of me.

So yeah, I got ditched by the real Ashley and the AI Ashley. For the record, one Ashley humiliating me was enough. Now I'm out $1200 and my dignity. Clearly the simulation is messing with me at this point.

But wait! There's more. Since I'm determined to immortalize my poor decision-making, I launched a brand-new crypto token: $SLUTAI . That's right—meet the world's first AI Slut coin. It's half revenge scheme, half modern art project, and 100% "I can't believe this is my life right now."

So come watch me crash and burn on Telegram —I'm literally inviting random strangers to roast me. Sometimes you just want an audience while you spiral, you know?

Grab your popcorn, invest in the fiasco, and maybe—just maybe—help me recover that $1200 that started this whole circus.

Thank you for coming to my comedy show. Tip your waiters on the way out.